I'll Never Forget
by Jane Potter Skywalker
Summary: Vignette Padmé's thoughts after Anakin's turn to the Dark Side.
1. I'll Never Forget

Disclaimer: All characters are the property of George Lucas and bla, bla, bla... all that stuff that you all know!  
  
I'll Never Forget  
  
I'll never forget the first day I saw you.. the day you called me angel... the day when that boy's eyes fell in love with me...  
  
We were young in that time, very young... You, Anakin, you were a slave that wanted more than everything to become a Jedi Knight... that wanted to see all the stars in this galaxy... I was Queen of Naboo, that in that time was being invaded, I didn't know very well why... However, now I know... All that situation it was a strategie, a strategie to become Palpatine the most powerful man in the galaxy. He knew I was vulnerable and that I was going to support him... after all, he was Senator from Naboo and I was Queen from Naboo!  
  
After the invasion ends, everything in this galaxy changed. We spent ten years without seeing each other and during that time, we grew up... I left the post of Queen to become a Senator.. and you became a Jedi Padawan... what you've always wanted to be!  
  
During these ten years, just now I admit, I thought a lot in you. I thought if you're okay, I used to ask to myself if you're happy without your mother, I used to ask to myself if you thought in me...  
  
During these ten years, the only information I got from you was that you were in missions... and I truly thought that you didn't remember me anymore...  
  
It was then, in the day I came back to Coruscant, exactly ten years after our last meeting, that I saw you , coming in my flat in Coruscant, with your Master, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You had grown very much (the truth is, you're much taller than me), you were an Anakin completly different, but still, I saw in your eyes the boy I had met in Tatooine... but in your eyes I also saw desire... the promise of adventures... and that look made me feel uncomfortable.  
  
When the Jedi Council gave orders to you, to protect and take me to Naboo, I wasn't sad... It was the opportunity to be more time with you, to speak with you about everything that had happened in the last ten years... but, in that time, it wasn't really that what I wanted .. I wanted to stay in Coruscant.. to defend that stupid Law that I had had so much work to draw it up... That trip wasn't in my plans..  
  
Another thing that noone of us planned was our first kiss nor the fact that we fell in love. At the beginning, I didn't want to admit that I was in love with you.. I was afraid to admit it.  
  
On the other hand, when I told you that following your thoughts, they'd take us to a place where we could never be, I felt bad.. first , for me, because I was denying my love for you; second, for you... because I saw your sad face..  
  
But one day, some days later, I couldn't deny anymore what I felt for you.. and that happened in Geonosis. I remember as if it was today, your surprised face, certainly not expecting that declaration of love... It was also in Geonosis that we kissed for the second time... and that kiss.. oh yes.. that was a true kiss..  
  
After the battle in Geonosis, we got married in Naboo. Although it has been a discreet celebration, it was beautiful and it meant very much to me. I guess every women want , one day , marry and constitute family, and my dream had just started to come true.  
  
Unfortunelly, and to annoy our happiness, the Clone Wars had just started and you had to go to the War, while I stayed in Coruscant.  
  
While you're in the War, most of the nights, I couldn't sleep.. I only thought if you're okay, if you're casualty... and I only stayed more restful, when in the morning, I woke up and saw the message that you had sent to me. Although you're okay, I couldn't stop to think in you... you were always in my mind... I was always thinking in you.  
  
I guess you don't know how happy I was when you came home, after one battle... when you hugged me, I felt a big security, and when I was in your arms, everything seemed to be okay... but it wasn't...  
  
The War continued during three years, that to me seemed another ten... The only thing I wanted was that you come back home, safe and sound, to hug you, to kiss you... I knew we'd a secret marriage, but that.. that almost didn't matter.. The important it was that you're close to me, that I could see you everyday, that I could see you're okay...  
  
It was then, after three years, that the War finished. The Republic had won the Separatists (that was good) and you're going to come back home (which was much better). It was also by that time that the problems started... Palpatine refused to refund the powers that the Senate had given to him, years ago... that, truly concerned me and other Senators. It was by that time too, that I found out that I was pregnant... obviously, we're happy... we're going to be parents... our baby... I mean ... our babies were going to born in a Peace time... at least, we thought so!  
  
Palpatine continued refusing to refund the Emergency Powers during months and it was then, that I and some Senators decided to do something. Palpatine wanted to transform the , until now, Republic in an Empire, we thought so. As we thought this was a horrible idea, we decided to create a Rebellion Alliance.  
  
By this time, I was starting to feel worried.. about you. You'd always been very close to Palpatine and you were, you followed many advices of him and that was concerning me... Not only because I didn't trust him anymore, but also because I was afraid of your reaction when you figured out what I was planning. I wanted to be myself telling it to you, to try to explain it well... unfortunelly, it wasn't me that told you.. it was him, Palpatine! It was him that destroyed the man that I loved, it was him that destroyed our happiness, it was him that destroyed our marriage... In that day, in the day he told you, you came in my flat in Coruscant, furious, angry and nervous. It wasn't you.. I couldn't and I didn't want to believe it was you... And it was also in that day, you told me what I would never told you...  
  
"If you don't leave the Rebels, I can't stay with you... And if you join the Rebels, you'll be betraying Palpatine, you'll be betraying me! "  
  
I was shocked, sad.. The first thing I thought it was that Anakin in front of me, wasn't the Anakin with who I was married... the second thing I did was cry... I'll never forget how much I cried in that night... Never...  
  
Some weeks passed, till Obi-Wan came to me, to talk. He told me that all the Jedi Council knew about our marriage.. and that they also knew that Palpatine was a Sith... and you, his apprentice, now.  
  
Obi-Wan also told me that he was going try to turn you to the Light Side... he told me that he was going to meet you. He told me too to go to Naboo... and get some rest there, till the birth of the twins.  
  
I looked to him, surprised and sad, while he was telling me this... I wanted to see you again... I wanted to be with you again... I couldn't simply go to Naboo and stay there, knowing that you and Obi-Wan were fighting. Because of this, in the day that Obi-Wan left Coruscant, looking for you, I entered in his ship, but he didn't know I was there...  
  
Obviously, he sensed my presence and found me. We had a big argument.. but I didn't care... the only thing I wanted it was see you, one more time.  
  
Obi-Wan told me to stay in the ship, while you talked. I agreed, but I wasn't sure If I was going to fulfil it...  
  
I watched you fighting, don't know if you knew I was there... and in the moment you fell in that hell, I came out of the ship and I screamed for you... Don't know if you heard me...  
  
Coming back to Naboo, I cried your death very much... You're dead... Anakin, you're dead! You had died because of want so many power, because you thought you're the best Jedi ever...  
  
Weeks later, after being dived in a deep sadness, suddenly, I had a moment of happiness: the birth of our children.  
  
Luke is blonde as you, he got your eyes... he makes me remember you, Ani. Well, Leia, she seems to be stubborn as you, but she's very alike with me. When they were born, Obi-Wan wasn't in Naboo. He had gone to Coruscant, and came back days later, to meet the new Skywalkers. However, I noticed something weird in him...  
  
"What's going on?" I asked.  
  
"I have something to tell you.." he started , with a concerned look. "In Coruscant, they talk about a Dark Lord of the Sith, not Palpatine... his name is Darth Vader!" he added.  
  
I wasn't understanding.  
  
"Darth Vader, M'lady..." started once again Obi-Wan, looking to me. " .. is Anakin. Anakin is not dead. He was safe by an agent of Palpatine... and changed his name!" he said.  
  
It was a shock to me. I wasn't really expecting that..  
  
"He is more machine than man, M'lady." Obi-Wan said.  
  
I looked around me, thinking in everything he had told me. No... it can't be true!  
  
"If he is more machine than man, I'm sure he is not Anakin!" I said , firmly.  
  
"At least, he is not Anakin that we met..." Obi-Wan said.  
  
I started to cry.  
  
"He's dead... he's dead... I accepted that... and it was difficult enough... don't tell me now that he became a monster!" I exclaimed.  
  
Obi-Wan looked to me, with a sad look.  
  
"M'lady, I guess that the first thing Vader will want to find are you and the twins... so... I know it's difficult... but we have to separate them!" he said.  
  
I looked , in shock to him. They were born, some days ago.. No, I wouldn't separate them from me, I couldn't that!  
  
"I can't, Obi-Wan! I can't! They're babies! Little babies... I can't do that!" I said, in despair.  
  
"It has to be, Padmé!" he said. I started to say something, but he interrupted me. " Listen to me, tomorrow I'll took Luke to some place... perhaps Tatooine... perhaps Owen and Beru Lars can take care of him..." he added.  
  
I looked to Luke and Leia. They looked so calm to me... they're my twins...  
  
"I'm going to Alderaan.." I said, crying. " Perhaps Bail could take care of Leia... and I'll stay there too.." I added.  
  
Obi-Wan looked to me and nodded. Then, he left my bedroom and I stayed there, looking to my lovely children.  
  
Look now, Ani... Look what I have to do... I have to separate them.. and everything because of what? Because of who?  
  
Vader.  
  
How I hate him... it doesn't matter if he has your body... he certainly doesn't have your mind... and he is a machine.... and he is not you, Anakin!  
  
My little Luke... my little Leia.. why had this to happen to us? Why? Why, Anakin, have you believed more in Palpatine than in me or Obi-Wan? Why...?  
  
I wish this was just a bad dream... and that I could wake up and see you, right here, with me...  
  
Right now, I'm leaving Naboo. I have already said goodbye to Luke and Obi- Wan and it was painful... who assures to me that I'll see Luke again? Nobody! Nobody...  
  
Leia is in my arms, and I'm looking through the window of my ship, to Obi- Wan's ship. I'm feeling sad... tired... In this moment, I don't see Obi- Wan's ship anymore... now I'm looking to Leia. You would like her, Anakin.... she is so sweet and so pretty.. as Luke is...  
  
While she is falling asleep, I look to the space, to the stars (remember, Ani? The ones that you always wanted to see...), thinking in the past, in the present and in the future... and curiously, the only thing I know about the past and the present is that I still loving you.... and the only thing I know about my future, is that I'll stay in Alderaan, with our daughter, until the day.... I die.  
  
~Fin~ 


	2. Some reviews

Well... those are my replies to your reviews :  
  
**Trunxluvr82190:** Thank you so much :)  
  
**Formiguinha:** First of all, Thanks!  
  
Second... I'm portuguese (it's understood you, english people are not going to understand what I'm going to say lol)!  
  
Sou portuguesa sim! Também adoras Star Wars?? óptimo!! =D Sim, o Anakin é aquela base lol  
  
Alguma cena em português? Bem... posso tentar... é certo que as coisas saem mais facilmente em português do que em inglês... e como agora estou de férias... sim, vou tentar, e tentar fazer o meu melhor!  
  
Obrigada pela review (Thanks for the review ;) ) 


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